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This is the fifth episode of Doctor Who: Last of the Time Lords.
Plot[]
Doctor: Katherine, you're finally home.
Katherine: Doctor... Thank you. For everything. You've shown me everything you could in this time, and I didn't even ask for any of it. Doctor... I might want to go on another adventure sometime. Not with UNIT. With you.
Doctor: Well, I will also appreciate your presence as you conclude in returning to this Time And Relative Dimension In Space sometime later, but for now, you plead for your absence, so I release you under your request.
Katherine: I expected you to say "bye," but that's good enough.
Doctor: They always leave...
Katherine: I'm sorry, what?
Doctor: Nothing... Temporary accident... *snaps* You may leave.
Katherine: Goodbye, Doctor.
Doctor: Goodbye, Candel.
The TARDIS door is closed, then reopens.
Katherine: Doctor-
Doctor: I thought you were leaving.
Katherine: I am, but I need you to see something outside...
Doctor: Give me a three-word reason why I should.
Katherine: Ice of London.
Doctor: Ice?
Title sequence plays.
Doctor: Ice? ICE? What do you mean "ice?" There shouldn't be ice at this time of the year!
Katherine: A-
Doctor: Shut up! I told you to give me a three word reason! Not a four word reason!
Katherine: Please, Doctor-
Doctor: SIX WORDS? Uggh. You Pudding Brains and your Pudding Brain grammar.
Katherine: ICE WARRIORS!
Doctor: Eight words- Wait, how do you know about Ice Warriors?
Katherine: I was in UNIT, you know-
Doctor: FOURTEEN WORDS! Katherine, I'm going to have to ask you to leave this TARDIS immediately. I'll be out there in a minute, and I expect you to say no more than five words for the rest of the day.
Katherine exits the TARDIS.
Doctor: TARDIS, give me all data on Ice Warriors.
TARDIS: *a hologram appears in the form of Clara Oswald* Ice Warriors are an-
Doctor: Please, a different form.
TARDIS: Companion database must be updated.
Doctor: I only have two companions at the moment.
TARDIS: Companion database updated. *turns into Katherine*
Doctor: NO! She is NOT my companion, and never will be!
TARDIS: Delete companion database?
Doctor: If that's what it takes to take Katherine out... Yes.
TARDIS: Companion database deleted. *hologram disappears*
Doctor: Oh, great, what now? TARDIS, create new companion database.
No holograms appear.
Doctor: Fine. I'll just go find UNIT then, if you aren't going to help me.
The TARDIS appears in the UNIT base.
Doctor: *grabs the FLIPCAE and steps out of the TARDIS* Kate Stewart, I need all information about-
Kate Stewart: Ice Warriors. I know. They have sent us a message, Mr. President.
Doctor: Oh, I see I'm the president of the Earth again. What a surprise! Let's watch this message.
Kate Stewart: Would you mind letting us translate it with your TARDIS?
Doctor: I suppose I could enhance the TARDIS translation signal for a little bit. *pulls out the Sonic Screwdriver and points it at the TARDIS*
The TARDIS suddenly begins fixing itself and connecting some cords on the inside.
Doctor: *seems worn out* Much easier than enhancing it myself, but I still feel the work. I've uploaded my entire TARDIS onto this thing!
Kate Stewart: Start the Ice Warrior video.
Martha: Yes, ma'am.
Doctor: Martha?
Martha: Yes, Doctor?
Doctor: How did you know-
Martha: Blue box kinda gave it away. Plus we have millions of pictures of you.
Doctor: Katherine told me that you died.
Martha: She did, did she?
Kate Stewart: Go ahead, tell him the truth.
Martha: The Defenders of Earth had to keep information secret from everyone. We couldn't let anybody know we were alive, and if anyone found out that we were, well... We couldn't tell anyone else. We're only even allowed to leave UNIT headquarters under desperate situations.
Doctor: Well, Martha, play the video. What's this Defenders of Earth thing about?
Kate Stewart: Sort of a modern and secret version of Torchwood, which got shut down a few years ago.
Doctor: Okay, just play it already, then.
The video plays.
Ice Warrior: Doctor. We request your TARDIS. The sun will go supernova if you don't. Please, the world will freeze. Do not try to avoid us. We must live, or Earth must die. Choose, Doctor. Choose.
The video goes off.
Martha: Good thing we called for Earth President.
Kate Stewart: Martha, assemble the Defenders of Earth immediately.
Martha: Okay. Doctor?
Doctor: I'm never giving up my TARDIS. Why would they say, "please?"
Martha: That's what I thought. *speaking on a phone* Osgood, McGillop, Smith, and Candel, come immediately.
The Defenders of Earth arrive at UNIT.
Kate Stewart: Sir, there are only seven people in this world who know about the Defenders, and they're all in this room. We would try to get more of your companions, but it was impossible to connect to a different universe, and some of them are... Well, dead.
Doctor: It pains me to think about how they were Cybermen. And the fact that they were burned alive- well, not alive, but... I don't know.
Kate Stewart: Some of them are too young, some of them have completely forgotten about you, and some of them just didn't want to join us.
Doctor: You do realize you don't have to say "some of them" when you're only talking about one of them.
Kate Stewart: Well, have you updated your companion database lately? We could use a few new members.
Doctor: I just updated it today! Well, actually, I deleted it entirely.
Kate Stewart: Do you know what that could do?
Doctor: Is there any way to reupload the database to my TARDIS?
Kate Stewart: Yes, but we'd need a sonic neurotransmitter stronger than your screwdriver.
Doctor: Where are we going to find one of those?
McGillop: I know exactly where we could find them.
Doctor: Where?
McGillop: Trade your TARDIS for one. The Ice Warriors will probably agree to get you a sonic transmitter if you trade it to them.
Doctor: I don't want to trade my TARDIS.
Martha: Rule one.
Doctor: I recently modified rule one, it's now "the Doctor lies."
Martha: It was always that.
Doctor: It was, now was it?
Mickey: I think what they're trying to say is you will trade your TARDIS, but ask for the sonic transmitter first. Then, don't give the TARDIS to them, and fly back to UNIT.
Osgood: We're doing all of this for a companion database, not the Earth. It will anger the Ice Warriors, and they're just going to freeze Earth.
Doctor: I'll find a way to unfreeze the Earth.
Kate Stewart: He is Earth president for the time being.
Doctor: Okay, I'll be back. *jumps inside the TARDIS*
The TARDIS flies to an Ice Warrior battleship.
Doctor: *gets out of the TARDIS* Hello, Ice Warriors. Nice to see you. I'm offering to trade my TARDIS for a sonic transmitting device.
Ice Warrior: We shall retrieve your requested device. What type of sonic device would you like?
Doctor: Strongest sonic transmitter there is: A sonic stave.
Ice Warrior: Sonic staves. We have several weapons. The Captain has special sonic versions of those weapons, perhaps he has a sonic stave.
Doctor: Would you go check?
Ice Warrior: Yes.
The Ice Warriors leave, then return a few minutes later.
Ice Warrior: Lucky for you, we found a sonic stave. Here you go. *hands a sonic stave*
Doctor: Thank you, now I must leave. I'll never let you have one of my two companions that I'll always have.
Ice Warrior: What?
Doctor: *steps in TARDIS* Goodbye.
Ice Warrior: Initiate supernova sequence.
The TARDIS flies back to UNIT headquarters.
Kate Stewart: I see you've gotten a... What is this?
Doctor: Sonic stave, and I have to be quick. *points sonic stave at UNIT companion database, then points it at TARDIS* Thank you. *steps in TARDIS*
Meanwhile...
Ice Warrior: The sun goes supernova in 5... 4... 3... 2... 1... 0.
The sun suddenly starts going supernova.
To be continued...
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